▼TECKTONIK▼

just got back from the sec 2 camp and it was fill with pain and agony... first day i felt so great that i can hang with all my friends for three days.... then something struck on my mind why am i feeling down on the day It self?.... i really not sure what or why but maybe just maybe i felt something passed me.... when i was at the bus my class sing in the bus and safar played the guitar, we were all singing loudly and full of joy except me.... my facilitator was kenny and sam... they was feel with joy and concern always... the first dae was boring because we never do anything much... the past was suppose to stay at the past but then i drag it all the way to camp but then all of it just gone when jovy, man leow, ginny, qi wei, zheree, desmond azwan mark and all of their class talk to me.... i feel that i have a huge relationship with class 2E2 they always will be there for me and i really love them so much... better than my class.... they never had the intention to hurt my feelings...then on the first night i slack with jovy ginny and qi wei.. for awhile as it is almost lights out... we drink have fun and laugh... second day was fun and tiring got trekking... it was 6 hours i think we walk around up hill down hill left right play games it was really stupid but much fun as i was fill with allot of adrenaline i went up hill really fast and the weakest link was really pulling my team down... we need to stop for him and waste precious time... we had to eat at this shop that sells 2 prata and a drink for $3 as all of us were oni given $3 to survive on that day... after everything we head back to the camp site... at night i was feeling allot of emotions rush into myself that i had the break down.... as my classmate called me name and i feel so pissed at them and then more of them called me names i tried to ignore them but the name calling was so painful i had to cool down at somewhere so i storm out of their sight and i went upstairs to the hall staircase and sat there to cool myself down.... the staircase was told to me that it was haunted but i went there without a care and when i was feeling slightly better jovy came to say hi and she saw me feeling down she immediately say the question "eyh what happen" she use the concern voice at me and i hate people showing concern to me... so i did not deliberate to her until she really make me tell so i tell her abit then she want to bring me somewhere there is quiet.... then half way i say them so i was really pissed and i went another direction then got azwan infront of me i freaking pissed and he was making jokes so i take his hand and push vigorously to another side.... i never look back but i heard jovy shout azwan.... i dnt care at that moment but then i stay at outside of the canteen and eventually she found me again she said seriously what is bothering me i really dnt want to tell so i ignore her... again she said and i need to tell her as if i dont she will be thinking bout this problem so i tell her and i said can we go to the staircase so that know one will know bout this problem?.... she agree and walk with me to the destination... so i delibrate everything to her and when i feeling comfortable telling her two of my form teacher pop out of no where and ask jovy to leave and she tried not to leave but then she got force to btw i have not told her everything but just half of it.... so my form teacher tried to ask me to tell them so i refuse to tell them as i really not in the mood to tell them so i kept silence all the way... then a sudden thing zheree came to me and say "ali" before he can say the other word my teacher said "can't you see we are having a conversation?" then zheree almost left i said to him what? then he said jovy was looking for me and i ask why? he said she was worried.... then i tried to find her cos i hate it when people worry bout me then my form teacher said why are you not telling us why am i emo? so i shout at them if you dont bring her back i will not say so i walk away from them and they was actually angry at me for being rude so they talk to me in the morning why am i angry so i say that you pissed me of by telling my friends to go away(i really love all my friends so i will always protect them).... so the next day i found jovy and ask her what she want? she said later we talk but then we really never collaborate what is it... then i went to apologise azwan for vigorously pushing him and he denied the request so i really want to apologise to him cos he is my close friend in band and i dont want him to be angry at me cos later i will not be happy coming for band... that is all for the past that i have in camp and in Monday i want to set thing straight to azwan and jovy.... so thanks for reading chaos... :P